Marlene Wallach is your go-to resource for all things beauty, fashion, modeling, lifestyle and wellness in the sometimes “trying” world of teens and tweens. As president of Wilhelmina Kids & Teens for nearly two decades, she is your Champion of Girl Power! And, when the going gets tough, the answer is Just Ask Marlene!
Just Ask Marlene on Facebook
Learning to use your voice to stand up for yourself is important to being happy. Many of us sometimes struggle with finding the courage to ask for what they want. Whether you are a model who needs to take a break during a shoot or just you, it’s totally understandable to feel jumpy inside when asking for a raise in your allowance or for a big favor from a friend. To make the conversation go a little smoother, try out the tips below. Whether you get what you asked for or not, going for what you want will make you feel better. Promise.
6 Ways to Ask for What You Want and Get It… Sometimes
1. See eye to eye: Making eye contact is step number one. Looking someone in the eye is a big sign that you are confident and believe in what you are saying. It’s also a chance to make a real connection with the person you hope will give you what you want!
2. Smile: Oh yeah, that again. Smiling never hurts. Don’t be fake, but a warm smile will put everyone in the discussion at ease.
3. Body language: Your body says as much as your words. Even if you are really nervous as you approach the conversation, you can fake confidence by standing straight with your shoulders back. Don’t hunch over since it’s a sign that you don’t feel worthy of your request. And don’t cross your arms, which look like you are ready for a fight.
4. No crybabies: Don’t whine for what you want. You’ll get a lot more sympathy for your cause if you simply state your wishes. And don’t complain if things don’t go your way. Instead try to understand the other person’s argument by listening. You might find a compromise, and you’ll definitely be more convincing if you decide to ask again later.
5. Practice makes perfect: If you have something really hard to ask, you might want to first write down your thoughts on a piece of paper. What do you want to say? What are you trying to achieve? Once you have a clear idea, grab a friend or parent and practice what you want to say out loud. You might stutter or stammer at first, but the more you repeat your request, the easier it will become to say it straight.
6. Never say you’re sorry: Ever heard someone say, “I’m sorry but can I ask you a question?” You don’t need to apologize. Just ask! It’s perfectly fine wherever you are—at home, at school or with your friends. So go ahead and ask away. ... See MoreSee Less
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